6th place — 2024 BIPOC essay contest: Sarah L. Ramos-Gonzalez

FFRF awarded Sarah $1,000.

By Sarah L. Ramos-Gonzalez

For 18 years, I went to Catholic mass every Sunday. In a Mexican immigrant community, going to Spanish mass was a spiritual haven for the principled, but I, evidently, witnessed a culture of shame.

I remember my mother instructing me to close my legs at age 7, making me fear that someone would look up a child’s skirt, and of old ladies forcing a shawl on my 10-year-old shoulders for modesty purposes. But I saw through their excuses to sexualize my body. I remember sitting at mass, and the priest blessing a 15-year-old girl by pressuring her to remain pure in a world where young porn-watching men kill indecent girls. It broke my heart the number of instances I recall priests and community leaders blindly demonizing the youth, being intolerant of other religions, involving the words “porn” and “drugs” in sermons, denying mental health issues’ existence and spreading homophobic rhetoric.

From embedding extremist political agendas in their interpretation of 2,000-year-old scripture to fear-mongering, the pain I felt after what should have been an uplifting religious experience told my soul that church was not for me. Even as I furthered myself from religion throughout my teens, I held onto the belief that the Catholics around me were open-minded in the name of Christ. My hopes withered through the alienating stares my Indian partner received when we attended church last year. I see religion as a vehicle for community leaders to subtly disseminate extremist right-wing political agendas to undereducated, predominantly poor populations. When advocating for racial equality, self-acceptance and civil rights, religious faith can hamper these causes by convincing its believers that diversity is wrong, and everyone must adhere to their strict guidelines to be equal.

Since race is something a person cannot change, joining a homogenous religious community is impossible.

My freedom from religion has taught me to be emotionally mature, critically thinking and compassionate, without the rigidity of tribal thinking. In an era of unlimited information, it takes one search to see how the Catholic Church has a centuries-old tradition of avoiding accountability when abusing its believers, only to call their mistakes a forgivable exception.

In today’s polarized America, religion can perpetuate its characteristic culture of entitlement and bias, making their believers vulnerable to the manipulative tactics of its leaders. I see the errors in the institutions that adults around us uphold. In religious communities, issues regarding equality are regarded with discomfort and ignorance. In a world where young people like me are expected to fix the world, we need tolerance and diversity. Modern religion can become a place of confirmation bias for people with discriminatory rhetoric. By taking individuals outside their comfort zones, we can teach everyone that being a good person occurs regardless of religious virtue. Values such as kindness, selflessness and patience are timeless. In a crisis, they make the difference between tragedy and a community strong enough to problem-solve and move forward together.

Sarah, 18, is attending Yale University in New Haven, Conn., where she plans to go into law school.

Sarah writes: I recently finished my medical gap year due to hip surgery in September. I am currently homeless. In my free time, I love to spend time with my amazing partner by playing video games and trying new food. I can solve the Rubik’s cube in as little as 23 seconds, and I was featured on ABC15 news last spring. My career goal includes going to law school to become a lawyer who advocates for underprivileged communities, and writing books that reflect my journey as a person who overcame adversity.”